Comedy | Sci-Fi | Improv
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 10:17 — 9.4MB)
Math guides the universe. If someone says “I’d like to fly,” there universe will say “look at math” and they will know that they can not fly. Then the universe will go on, like, “birds have hollow bones and…” and you’re, like, “shut up, universe. I stopped caring about that two decades ago. You talk really slowly.”
The Mustache Rangers deal with math and books in this week’s podcast episode. Bring it into your brain.
It’s that time of the year again. Time to turn your gazes to the Brave New Workshop. It’s time for the 4th Annual Twin Cities Improv Festival. Bringing improv groups from around the country and multi-show passes to the general vicinity of Hennepin and 26th.
June 24th at 7pm, the start date and time of the festival! June 28th at 8pm, the festival’s last show including a live performance by the Mustache Rangers. Laying claim to improv and the Uptown area, for the American way! This is the 4th Annual Twin Cities Improv Festival!
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 9:23 — 8.6MB)
There has been a lot of talk about oil recently. Of course the Mustache Rangers want in on that action. Talking heads are paid pretty well, from what little we understand.
Listen and enjoy this week’s comedy podcast episode. It’ll put things right.
The Lineated Barbet Magmahouse linen is a big ol’ bird that likes fruit. It’s a frugivore. No joke! It especially likes that stuff you get a the deli with marshmallows in it. But not the kind with grapes. It likes the ones with cherries.
This one time, a Lineated Barbet was at a party, and the tiger throwing the party was, like, “thanks for coming! Have some meat I killed,” and the Barbet was, like, “Naw, I just eat fruit.” That’s totally rude. Do not invite them to parties.
Nobody knows where they nest. They’re usually up all night going “woo!” And during the day, they’re taking up seats at coffee shops. Listen, birds. You can’t live at the coffee shop. Other people like to sit too.
Their feathers are bright red.
(Photo by Mike (NO captive birds) in Thailand)
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 9:51 — 9.0MB)
If there were a world championship for stalling, the Mustache Rangers would win it. Too bad there is only a universe wide championship for stalling. It’s called the Uni-N-Stall. Dark matter wins every space year.
There is another podcast episode for your ears this week. Put it in there.
Hey there. Welcome to the Mustache Rangers website. If this is your first time here, then you might be overwhelmed by the large number of podcasts. Well, don’t fear! I’m here to help!
Why not check out a few of our favorite podcast episodes where the Mustache Rangers pretend to be truckers, are joined by a robot, decide on a vacation spot, and are joined by Kevin Murphy of Mystery Science Theater 3000.
If you like what you hear, why not subscribe on iTunes and tell all your friends about it? Why not?
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 13:27 — 12.3MB)
If life is truly a game, then it is longer and more boring than Monopoly. Tell your sisters they should give up already, because you want to go to bed. It’s getting absurd. Honestly, everyone has 20 hotels on everything. Something is very wrong here.
The Mustache Rangers talk about numbers in this week’s podcast. Enjoy ip. Ip? Huh. We meant it. I mean, we mean it. It?
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 10:11 — 9.3MB)
Just a reminder, there are outtakes at the end of most Mustache Rangers episodes. This week’s episode has a particularly long one. Enjoy the podcast now!
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 8:56 — 8.2MB)
The Mustache Rangers get pretty crude in this week’s podcast. So, you know, better put on your excitement-resistant pants.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 8:24 — 7.7MB)
Who doesn’t hate children? Even children hate children. Speaking of children, the Mustache Rangers get a call from Jack Harty of the famous Harty Boys in this week’s podcast. You may have heard about their success with the case of the limping platypus. You may not have too. You should have though. The Harty Boys are very noisy children.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 9:40 — 8.8MB)
Sometimes, after a few cold ones, you might get to thinking that a stylish goatee would really compliment your mustache. That’s when you need to call the Mustache Rangers hotline at 612-234-3456 so we can get you some help, because that is crazy thinking.
There is a new podcast this week. Dial it up on your computer phone.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 11:47 — 10.8MB)
It may surprise you that there are 150 episodes of the Mustache Rangers podcast available for your listening pleasure. It may also surprise you that air is necessary for your survival. If both of these things surprise you, someone can probably claim you as a dependent on their tax forms.
The Mustache Rangers celebrate their 150th episode today with their 150th episode. It’s like a hand drawing the hand that is drawing it. Enjoy!
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 11:12 — 10.3MB)
The Mustache Rangers apologize for the lack of an episode last week. It’s easy to blame Computer, but it was totally the fault of Computer. We were all, like, “Record audio,” and Computer was all “Nawwww.”
Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 11:47 — 10.8MB)
Just another podcast episode where the guys are floating around in their spaceshi….holy crap! They aren’t on the spaceship today? Well butter my bottom and call me Jessica Tandy’s friend Margret.
Enjoy this week’s podcast. We can’t make you. It is only a suggestion.
Sound FX attributes:
By Benboncan (http://www.freesound.org/usersViewSingle.php?id=634166)
By Tito Lahaye (http://www.freesound.org/usersViewSingle.php?id=453534)
The Old Vanderburgh County Courthouse, often simply called “Old Courty Court,” is a place where old people used to go to talk about boring things but not anymore. It is now a home for vegetarian snakes. Do not be fooled. Vegetarian snakes still bite.
Originally located in Evansville, Indiana, the courthouse was moved to Greece in 3015. The Grecian government had ordered too many vegetarian snakes from Lord Darkness of the Rainbow Nebula for their Special Snake Olympics and they needed a place to store the snakes. Old Courty Court was the obvious choice.
After the courthouse was moved entirely by brown field mice, it was filled with sand and lettuce for the vegetarian snakes. The mice were invited to stay, as thanks for their hard work, but they were too bigoted against snakes to accept the offer and instead decided to drown themselves en masse in the KFC Sea(formerly the Aegean Sea).
The snakes that inhabit Old Courty Court never age, never breed, and never die. This is because the building was placed on a gypsy by the brown field mice. The snakes pray for death, but it never comes. Also, they are always hungry. Also, no one will install cable there because they are creeped out by immortal snakes for some reason.
All snakes ordered from Lord Darkness were thrown out of the Special Snake Olympics due to drug violations.
(Photo by jimmywayne)
