Thinking leads to trouble, and no good comes of it. When you think you might be having a thought, simply turn to one of the government’s many regulation entertainment programs. For instance, there is the House of Apples located in every town where you can practice eating apples. Since apples do not exist, you will be using faux horse chestnuts. Faux because horse chestnuts no longer exist. Or you can mosey on down to the Twirl Your Arms Around center, where an instructor will indicate when you should twirl your arms around. These are all fine alternatives to thinking.
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