The Mustache Rangers Podcast

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Quote Index

The Mustache Rangers Get a Message

  • All hail the Great Mustache!
  • There’s no women in the Mustache Rangers just for that purpose. So there’s no weird sexual things going on. Even though are sometimes. But still, you know.
  • Turn off the warning alarm. It’s giving me a headache.
  • Don’t tell me what I know and do not know. Of course that is the word “bastard.”
  • I have a big backyard.

The Mustache Rangers Appreciate

  • That’s a good place to poke.
  • I appreciate all you do for me.
  • Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.
  • Whales are not natural occurrence of events.
  • Grogglestein.
  • My own appreciation is a little bit masturbatory.
  • Pajama-jammy-jam.
  • Smells up the ship real nice. Better than our man stank.

The Mustache Rangers Are Stranded

  • Yautuming with the yautomaible.
  • If there’s a word, that means it’s something.
  • I think you mean “taste.”
  • You’re a very very bad sponsor.
  • The ship will get drunk.
  • That’s funny because it happened to somebody else.
  • I’m pretty sure you don’t understand science.

The Mustache Rangers Dine

  • And then when you peel off their face they are nothing but a dog like creature.
  • Overall you have a tendancy to lean towards the dumbs.
  • We have chicken fingers. I don’t know if they come from lady chickens
  • Ride my hope.

The Mustache Rangers Get News

  • Let me get this straight, I ask you to look deep down inside you and you see a bearded naked man waving in the wind. Not with his hand.
  • I really don’t care that I have a sister I never met.
  • – Well, I like to work.
    – Well, that’s dumb.
  • If your work is your fun then ever day is Saturday.
  • Tareesi is not going to be deep inside me.

The Mustache Rangers Relax

  • Seriously, how can you call yourselves a civilized race of aliens when you don’t even expect to be slaughtered.
  • Back rubs for everyone!
  • Now hold this crystal.
  • – I can feel all my cares and stresses being sucked up into that pyramid.
    – And it will keep milk fresh.
  • I’m orange tinted and forever holding a crystal.
  • I’ve never had a good fist experience.
  • Nothing gets my day going like a good fisting.

The Mustache Rangers Fear

  • Space lions!
  • Are you looking up lion pornography, Computer?
  • I think the lion is being violated.
  • It was just a lot of biting and caressing.
  • You’re going to have to change regardless of the how you feel.

The Mustache Rangers Join a Club

  • I like it. Nah, I don’t. DIS!
  • Shut up. Shut up for a second.
  • It’s not really jell-y, it’s jell-o.
  • Permission to speak and also get a hug.
  • Moment on the lips, lifetime without teeth.

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