Hugging is for the weak and stupid. If some dapper chap comes around to embracing you, be well aware that his intent is most likely to kill you and steal your best gal. It is a dangerous world and you must never become close with anyone. You will only be hurt horribly.

The Mustache Rangers learn to relax in today’s interpod netcast. Pick up your ears and take in their sounds!

Podcast: Download (Duration: 8:42 — 3.0MB)

To the foolish and dimwitted, the moon seems to disappear and reappear due to the forces of wizards. To the well mannered and witty, the rear end of a vehicular looks like the best place to inform others of their opinions.

The Mustache Rangers bring you another thrilling adventure this week. Enjoy with no compliments.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 19:18 — 6.6MB)

It is an old saying that giving a man a peach is lick a powerful blow to his forehead. The peach is the weakest of all fruit, and is an insult to all. When the president of space discovered this, all the peach trees were burnt. The state formerly known as Georgia, now know as Grimland, was once known for peaches. This is one more reason not to mistrust the space president.

The Mustache Rangers have put together more stores for you. Listen to them, and make certain you enjoy them.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 15:26 — 5.3MB)

An animal once spoke and said that the sky was falling. So its speaking genes would not be passed on to future generations of animals, the creature with a voice was eaten. Oddly enough, the eater went mute. What does this tell us? Chew at least 20 times before swallowing.

The Mustache Rangers have gotten themselves into another situation. Listen to their netcast now!

Podcast: Download (Duration: 14:03 — 4.8MB)

It has been said that under times of intense desperation, a mother may have the power to lift a boulder pushed by a cougar off her infant man child. If there only a way, any way possible, to harness the raw energy of the cougar. Mankind would soon become something more akin to cougar kind, and boulders would no longer stand a chance against us.

It is easy to harness the Mustache Rangers interpod netcast. Enjoy it now.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 14:17 — 4.9MB)

Make no mistake, the Mustache Rangers never lose. But when they do lose, it is with grace and dignity. And also, because someone else cheated. A ruse was put in to place, and it will not be stood for. This is absurdity at its very base level. Losing is not an option, and when that option is available it causes a chain reaction of independent record stores to open and close at random. It is quantum physics. You would not understand.

Enjoy the podcast of this week.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 16:23 — 5.6MB)

It Europe, the fairer sex often gives freedom to their underarm follicles. In Space Europe, aliens with only one gender eat something akin the mashed potatoes except they are made out of stars and wishes.

There are many differences between things. But every man, woman, and child loves the Mustache Rangers. This is an example of something that is not different between things. A supreme example, at that. Take it to heart, and embroider it in your memories.

Podcast: Download (Duration: 14:02 — 4.8MB)

The Mustache Rangers will be appearing at this year’s Twin Cities Improv Festival. There will be an obcsene amount of belly laughs during the entire festival, so you should purchase your tickets now to make certain a space is saved for you.

The Mustache Rangers will be performing on June 23rd at 7:00pm. Do not limit your enjoyment to just their exploits. There will be much more improv to see!

Get your over sized behind in motion! The Twin Cities Improv Festival is here!